Can I be pretty?

I often get asked why I got my septum pierced, or why I do weird things with my hair and the honest truth is I don't feel like I've got a real chance of ever looking "pretty" so I've opted for being "alternative."

I am not, at all, the standard of beauty. I'm heavy set with small, practically blind eyes that require glasses, and a moon face that just makes me look even chunkier.I'm a tomboy at heart and would rather wear jeans and a t-shirt than a sundress any day of the week

I've never been told by anyone other than someone I was dating, that I was pretty or beautiful and I've come to know that it's just a fact. I have been called sexy, but that's different in my mind. Alternative looking girls can be sexy because they fit into this almost fetish mold. Look at Suicide Girls! Most of those girls wouldn't be considered attractive without the crazy hair, piercings and tattoos.

So if you've ever wondered why I gravitate to these bizarre looks or alternative style, you don't have to anymore. Aside from liking the look on other people (I've become very attracted myself to other alternative styled people as well, and prefer to date people who have an alternative look), I feel like it makes me attractive to at least one sect of the population instead of being average to all of the population.

One of my friends from high school used to call me "anti pretty," which i think give the connotation that I wouldn't want to be pretty, but that's not the case. It's just something I don't think is achievable, so I don't try.

Sorry about the randomness of this post. It's been a bad day and I needed to vent a little.